MORE OF ME (FOR ME) TO LOVE

Gaining weight is never fun. No one wants to look at the scale and see that the numbers have jumped up or look in the mirror and see a little extra flub. The question is why? Why do we focus so much of our time and attention on the number on the scale or some extra skin on our bodies? What we should be focusing on is why we are gaining weight. Where is that weight coming?

I have gained a fair amount of weight over the past eight or so months (30lbs to be exact) and it’s something that has bothered me. I would look in the mirror and see the extra skin and be sad. I would struggle to button my pants and get angry. I would look at old pictures where I was at my ideal weight and feel regret. I would feel sad, angry and regretful until I looked at the reasons why I was gaining weight.

One of the big reasons is because I am not a teenager anymore. I am a woman – a woman with a lower metabolism but more curves. This isn’t something to be upset about – it is something to be proud of. Growing up I was blessed with a small frame and the ability to eat without gaining weight. Even with the weight, I have gained I am still not what many would consider big or fat because of my smaller frame. There is just now some extra skin attached to that small frame.

The main reason why I gained weight because of how I’ve been eating. I’ve been eating out a lot and making a lot of poor choices with food. Does this upset me? Not at all. Many of those times eating out were memories. I was eating out with friends or family spending time together eating delicious but sometimes fattening food. I started a new job which involved a lot of travel and therefore eating on the road and dinners out with colleagues. Again, is this bad? Nope. I am working doing a job I love and spent time out getting to know colleagues and making new friends.

Does this mean every single time I ate out was for one of those reasons? Again nope! The idea of eating out is saving it for these occasions which mean cutting back – eating at home and making healthier choices when possible. I think that gaining weight is okay as long as you are remaining healthy – and that is my only regret. Choosing to eat out a bit too much and neglecting my health.

Now when I look in the mirror instead of seeing the skin I look at myself I see growth. I see that I am aging and maturing and becoming more of a woman each day. Not that you need curves to be a woman – you definitely do not – but for me, my curves help me embrace that side. When I look at the extra skin I think of the memories I have made with family and friends – of delicious burgers, fries, and cheesecake. I also see opportunity. I see the weight I’ve gained and the curves I’ve acquired and think about switching some of my bad eating habits out for good ones – throwing in some workouts and building the body I want while still loving the body I have.

 

 

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